Finger Blastin'
**THIS BLOG IS SEMI-SEXUALLY EXPLICIT, SO DON'T READ IF YOU CAN'T DEAL (HA HA, I SAID SEMI!)**
Corey sent me an email in response to a question I emailed him (the point here is that we email each other, phone conversations have come to a grinding halt, but that's a whole different blog for a whole different day).
The question was (verbatim): Okay, so when you dance with a chick, do you feel her up? Like, hands on her thighs, then stray north? Even further, do you lick her neck?
To which your boy's answer was (again, verbatim): if ur talkn bout finger blasting a girl n the dance floor then no i dont do that i just go were the song takes me
Now, Corey has the ability to shock the hell outta me from time to time and each time he does, I'm speechless. More often than not, it's some sort of sexual imagery. And they're hilarious. Like, fall out on the floor, tears in my eyes hilarious. So when I read the email (at work) and came across "finger blastin'," you can imagine my reaction. I laughed SO loud, my boss came to check on me. I had to leave my office and go to the bathroom to compose myself. SO FUNNY!
But Corey's comment brought about something I've been meaning to blog about a few weeks ago. I just have A.D.D. and I need triggers to remember things. Anyway, I was watching the Bad Boys of Comedy a while back and a comedian brought up a very good point: What ever happened to fingering? I mean, in a world where people have sex on the first date and actually make it work, when did we lose the middle ground?
I remember when I was dating, there was supposed to be a buildup. First, you made out, then you felt the goods, then the "finger blastin'," then sex. Aren't those the bases? So what happened? Why do we now go straight to bedroom without so much as a "What is your last name?" Now don't get me wrong, I was a fan of the activity, but didn't partake in it often. That's cuz if I set out to have sex, I had sex. Not to mention, I haven't had the greatest and/or most in tune partners in the world. But I digress.
Nowadays, kids in middle school are having sex and don't even know what fingering is, they get head and get down to business. I always wondered what kind of pleasure a man got from playing a little finger music with his lady, but I guess it's a bit of a power thing. They can control the amount of pleasure a woman receives. He can play with her, take her to the edge and bring her back, all with a flick of the wrist. Not to mention the "come hither" motion that hits the G-Spot and triggers multiple orgasms. All right, all right, it's the ego boost, I get it.
Well damn, now I'm all hot and bothered and can't concentrate. I need sex, Airbooty 2005 is about to be back in business, especially since I've got a free flight burnin' a hole in my pocket. Cuz Pennsylvania's a 12 hour drive...
Corey sent me an email in response to a question I emailed him (the point here is that we email each other, phone conversations have come to a grinding halt, but that's a whole different blog for a whole different day).
The question was (verbatim): Okay, so when you dance with a chick, do you feel her up? Like, hands on her thighs, then stray north? Even further, do you lick her neck?
To which your boy's answer was (again, verbatim): if ur talkn bout finger blasting a girl n the dance floor then no i dont do that i just go were the song takes me
Now, Corey has the ability to shock the hell outta me from time to time and each time he does, I'm speechless. More often than not, it's some sort of sexual imagery. And they're hilarious. Like, fall out on the floor, tears in my eyes hilarious. So when I read the email (at work) and came across "finger blastin'," you can imagine my reaction. I laughed SO loud, my boss came to check on me. I had to leave my office and go to the bathroom to compose myself. SO FUNNY!
But Corey's comment brought about something I've been meaning to blog about a few weeks ago. I just have A.D.D. and I need triggers to remember things. Anyway, I was watching the Bad Boys of Comedy a while back and a comedian brought up a very good point: What ever happened to fingering? I mean, in a world where people have sex on the first date and actually make it work, when did we lose the middle ground?
I remember when I was dating, there was supposed to be a buildup. First, you made out, then you felt the goods, then the "finger blastin'," then sex. Aren't those the bases? So what happened? Why do we now go straight to bedroom without so much as a "What is your last name?" Now don't get me wrong, I was a fan of the activity, but didn't partake in it often. That's cuz if I set out to have sex, I had sex. Not to mention, I haven't had the greatest and/or most in tune partners in the world. But I digress.
Nowadays, kids in middle school are having sex and don't even know what fingering is, they get head and get down to business. I always wondered what kind of pleasure a man got from playing a little finger music with his lady, but I guess it's a bit of a power thing. They can control the amount of pleasure a woman receives. He can play with her, take her to the edge and bring her back, all with a flick of the wrist. Not to mention the "come hither" motion that hits the G-Spot and triggers multiple orgasms. All right, all right, it's the ego boost, I get it.
Well damn, now I'm all hot and bothered and can't concentrate. I need sex, Airbooty 2005 is about to be back in business, especially since I've got a free flight burnin' a hole in my pocket. Cuz Pennsylvania's a 12 hour drive...
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